Episode 101: “Recap IV: The Recap Home”
Written by “Krenim”
Published December 4, 2003
It’s recap time again! Yes, I know you really want the final three episodes, but you’re just going to have to wait! Mwahahahaha!
- Episode 77: “Recap III: The Search for Recap”
- When Season 3’s recap goes missing, the show’s main characters are forced to improvise.
- Episode 78: “In Like a Lion”
- By tricking the evil Excelsior crew into thinking they are dead, the Relativity crew is able to plant a tracking device on their enemies. This leads to the discovery of a Vaadwaur plot to attack Earth, and a terrible battle is waged between Starfleet and the Vaadwaur. When the tide turns in Starfleet’s favor, the Excelsior runs away, enraging Gorei. The Vaadwaur leader decides to play his hand and causes the Earth to vanish...
- Episode 79: “Out Like a Lamb”
- Gorei’s plot to capture Earth fails when his forces lose track of it in subspace. Much of the Vaadwaur fleet is destroyed by Admiral Picard’s faux-ton torpedo. Admiral Janeway and the evil crew of the evil Excelsior hide from just about everyone in a remote sector of space. The race is on to rescue the earth from the Vaadwaur subspace corridors...
- Episode 80: “The Federation Strikes Back”
- Braxton tries to enlist the aid of the Organians in rescuing Earth. Because the war does not involve them, the Organians refuse to help. Therefore, Braxton then tries to trick the Vaadwaur into attacking Organia by constructing a giant sign. The Vaadwaur invade, but the Organians know Braxton’s plan and still refuse to help.
- Episode 81: “Never Talk to Rangers”
- President Sheridan decides to invade the Star Trek universe as revenge for screwing up his own universe. Braxton and his crew introduce Sheridan to treknology, which will enable him to fix the B5 universe.
- Episode 82: “Satan’s Robot Conquers the Alpha Quadrant”
- Q makes another appearance when the Relativity crew go to watch a Captain Proton movie at a drive-in theater. Q causes Dr. Chaotica and his entire armada to become real. Admiral Janeway tries to woo Chaotica to her side by impersonating Queen Arachnia again, but Chaotica’s fleet is destroyed. When the Doctor takes over Satan’s Robot, Janeway dumps Chaotica and tries to convince him to help her rule the galaxy. Heartbroken, Chaotica destroys his fleet, and both Janeway and the Doctor escape.
- Episode 83: “When on Romulus...”
- The Romulan Senate is again destroyed by agents of the third Romulan homeworld: Fred. Braxton is sent to talk to the new guys in charge, and finds that one of them is Evil Doctor, another EMH Mark I! Evil Doctor’s plan is to graft the Doctor’s holographic matrix to his own so that he may live. Escaping to the Rifty-Like Nebula, Evil Doctor’s ship attacks. Braxton prevails when he pulls a Bill and Ted and erases Evil Doctor from history.
- Episode 84: “Tuvok and Roll”
- It turns out that Tuvok has been held prisoner on the evil Excelsior ever since the days of the Braxton Bunch. Finding this out, Janeway gives him a chance to join her, but he refuses. Tuvok uses his secret replicator to construct a transmitter to contact the Relativity. Ducane convinces Tuvok to stay on the Excelsior as a spy.
- Episode 85: “Year of Frell”
- Scorpius finally finishes his subspace drive, and it is installed on the Relativity. It is hoped that the drive will allow the ship to enter the Vaadwaur subspace corridors to rescue Earth, but it instead sends the ship (with Scorpy in tow) to the Farscape universe. Once there, they meet the Mirror Excelsior, which has been trapped there for several years.
- Episode 86: “Losers, Guns, and Money, Part I”
- To finance repairs to the subspace drive, the crews of the Relativity and the Mirror Excelsior decide to rob the First National Bank of Shadow. They plant tribbles and some quadrotriticale in the vault and wait for it to explode. However, before that can happen, the mad Peacekeeper Captain Steve arrives to avenge his not-really-dead brother on Mirror Evil Braxton...
- Episode 87: “Losers, Guns, and Money, Part II”
- When the Relativity extends it’s cloak around the Mirror Excelsior, Captain Steve assumes the ship ceased to exist and leaves. Nadira opens the vault prematurely for some Scarrans, causing tribbles to flood the First National Bank of Shadow. Taking advantage of the situation, Braxton and crew rob the vault, but Sulu is replaced by a Scarran bioloid in the process. When the bioloid fails to bring up Sulu’s rank, Braxton exposes it. Now Sulu must be rescued from the Scarrans...
- Episode 88: “Seeing Red, Part I”
- The Mysterious Red Button crashes onto a ledge hanging over the bottomless pit. It turns out an evil Pah-wraith cult lives down in the pit, waiting to use the Book of the Kosst Amojan and the Orb of Ultimate Evil to release the Pah-wraiths. Detecting strange readings from Bajor and knowing the bottomless pit and the Bajoran wormhole are about to align, Admiral Picard turns to the only ship that can stop the end of the universe... The evil Excelsior!
- Episode 89: “Seeing Red, Part II”
- After appealing to their self-preservation instincts, Picard manages to convince Janeway to save the universe. Unfortunately, the evil crew of the evil Excelsior have forgotten how to be good, so they let Tuvok out of his quarters to help them be good. The information on how to defeat the Pah-wraiths is delivered by the Mysterious Red Button, which appears on the ship in search of it’s ex-lackey Dukat. The Orb of Ultimate Evil and the Book of the Kosst Amojan are both destroyed, the Mysterious Red Button is sent tumbling into the bottomless pit (again), and Tuvok is locked back up again by Admiral Janeway.
- Episode 90: “May I Borrow a Cup of Flower?”
- While Scorpius tries to get the subspace drive working again, Braxton takes the Mirror Excelsior to rescue Sulu. Unfortunately, they are themselves captured as they attempt to cross the Scarran border. Taken to prison by the big-hatted Minister Ahkna, Braxton unwittingly saves everyone (including Sulu) by taking hostage one of the Scarrans’ crystherium plants. Getting back to the Relativity, they feed the plant’s petals to Scorpius, who becomes smart enough to fix the subspace drive. They activate the drive, escaping from the Scarrans.
- Episode 91: “Home Again”
- The Relativity and the Mirror Excelsior arrive back in the Star Trek universe, much to Admiral Picard’s disdain. While the Mirror Excelsior returns to the Mirror Universe, everyone fills the rest of the episode with massive foreshadowing...
- Episode 92: “Desperate Times, Part I”
- With the Vaadwaur fleet now rebuilt, Admiral Picard and the rest of Starfleet Command task Braxton with violating the Temporal Prime Directive by going back in time to stop Voyager from releasing the Vaadwaur from stasis in the first place. To counter this plan, Future Guy appears on the evil Excelsior and offers Admiral Janeway safety in exchange for stopping Braxton. When both the Relativity and the evil Excelsior arrive in the 24th Century, Captain Janeway must choose between believing her future self or Braxton...
- Episode 93: “Desperate Times, Part II”
- Braxton convinces Captain Janeway to believe him by bribing her with coffee, but Admiral Janeway has other ideas. She causes enough damage to Voyager to force it to land, and then tricks Seven of Nine into releasing the Vaadwaur. The evil Excelsior shields the Vaadwaur fighters, letting them escape. Admiral Picard is ticked off (yet again) and is forced to assign other timeships to clean up the temporal mess. Gorei is forced to take Admiral Janeway back.
- Episode 94: “Smorgasborg”
- Dax finally has enough of beeping consoles and does some massive hardware damage. Admiral Picard orders Braxton to seek an alliance with the Borg against the Vaadwaur following a (Next Generation) Borg attack on the Vaadwaur. Admiral Janeway senses one of her plots is getting ripped off, so she tries to stop Braxton. It turns out the Borg have no interest in assisting the Federation, and they try to assimilate the Relativity. Fortunately, Admiral Janeway shows up and the Borg send most of their ships to destroy their hated enemy. As both ship are about to get assimilated, Dax’s new console plays “It’s a Small World,” which the Borg are unable to purge from their memory banks. The feedback loop causes the Borg cubes to explode.
- Episode 95: “By Inferno’s Pale Moonlight”
- Still looking for allies, Admiral Picard sends Braxton to forge an alliance with the Happy Fun Dominion. The crew tries to trick the Female Shapeshifter into thinking the evil Excelsior (which the Relativity crew were in when they were there earlier) and the Vaadwaur and planning to attack. Gorei finds out what’s going on and launches a pre-emptive strike on the Happy Fun Dominion, effectively ending their usefulness as an ally.
- Episode 96: “Best Case Scenario”
- When the evil Excelsior’s subspace drive is damaged by the Relativity, Dukat accidentally lets loose a computer program designed by Evil Braxton to take command in the event of his death is activated. Learning that Admiral Janeway is in command instead, the program tries to exact revenge by surrendering to Braxton. Dark Helmet, protected by his gigantic helmet, manages to beat the ship’s defenses and disable the program. Before going offline, the program sends Captain Braxton a message: The Excelsior’s subspace drive must be used to save Earth.
- Episode 97: “Loose Ends”
- Garak, Pulaski, Hogan and V’Ger, the last remaining temporal fugitives, join forces. The Relativity is sent to stop them, but V’Ger is too powerful to beat. The Relativity crew convince Robert Wise to release a new version of Star Trek: The Motion Picture without V’Ger. Without V’Ger, the rest of the temporal fugitives are easily sent back to their own timelines.
- Episode 98: “The Episode of No Return”
- With the final episodes at hand, everybody takes a break. Damar finally speaks to the schoolchildren, Braxton loses a game of chess to his cat, Xaronna loads up with ammo to avoid the recurring character curse, and everybody else plays a card game. The evil crew of the evil Excelsior also take a break. At least, they try to until Janeway demands a cup of coffee. However, the ship is out of coffee. Dr. Frankenstein creates a single coffee bean using coffee DNA, and enough coffee beans are made by abusing the transporter to make Janeway’s coffee.
- Episode 99: “The Final Excelsior Battle (Really), Part I”
- When Captain Braxton responds to a fake distress call, the Relativity and the evil Excelsior do battle for the last time. When the Relativity loses it’s shields, the evil crew of the evil Excelsior boards the ship. Tuvok escapes captivity and brings down the Excelsior’s shields. The Relativity crew starts to mount a defense as Braxton beams over to the Excelsior for his final confrontation with Janeway...
- Episode 100: “The Final Excelsior Battle (Really), Part II”
- Braxton and Janeway fight each other on the evil bridge of the evil Excelsior as the remainder of the crews fight for control of the Relativity. One by one, the evil crew of the evil Excelsior is defeated. Braxton finally takes down Janeway when she is distracted by Tuvok. The evil Excelsior crew is locked away (again), and Scorpius gets to work outfitting the Relativity with a subspace drive...
The race to find Earth is finally over!
There’s just one problem...
The Vaadwaur win.
The series finale begins with
Episode 102: “The Road to Hell”